Question.
I have this friend who has been causing a lot of problems for me and I would like some sort of direction as to what to do about her.
She has been having an affair on her husband with my partners brother and lately I feel as though she is trying to get close
to a lot of my other friends to turn them all against me.
We had a bit of an argument a few weeks ago and she blamed me for her “relationship” break up with my brother-in-law.
We patched things up but I still feel very uneasy about her. She has caused a lot of problems for me and I feel like I need
to rid her of my life somehow, I just don’t know how and I would like to do it as easily as possible without causing any more problems.
Shes a very toxic person and its really starting to consume every little ounce of me, and I am starting to get annoyed and tired of her behavior.
If there is something, anything you can do to help me, I would really appreciate it.
Unfortunately, people like this are manipulative and will cause problems for anyone who becomes close to them. The best I can tell you is to have less and less time for her and when the explosion happens ( and it will) just cut her off and let your mutual friends know why. Then sit back and wait for the fall out. The point is that if you get to them before she does you will be able to do at least some damage control..
Toxic people are a real problem as they often are “addicted” to their toxic behavior. Addicted to their “game” this often involves manipulation by getting close to their victim and then spreading gossip behind their back so no one will be lose to them. They can be bullies, complainers, chronic seducers who want to make everybody like them and then try to black ball their competition, or worse sleep with your man….
I once had one of these who was so obsessed with sexual attention that she tried to sleep with me (I am straight) and then tried to seduce anyone who showed an interest in me ( men)
She was also a thief. I had to push her from my life and was threatened with slander for doing so… I knew what she was immediately when I met her, but she has involved herself with others in my social circle first so getting rid of her was a real mess.
These people can be extremely destructive.
The worst kind of toxic person is the type who know how to flatter others so they are liked. Everyone wants to have friends who tell them how great they are… But once they have a hold on your social circle, boy can they wreak some havoc…
The thing is to be careful of giving any personal information to someone new in your lif,e no matter how charming they may be. A toxic person is looking for just this, so it can be used against you later…
The other things is to advise your friends when you see suspicious behavior. It may cause friction but better that they get the picture up front than later, when you have become her friend only to find that you have been trashed and that they believe HER because you were her “close” friend…. And then just shut the door. Cut off communication and never look back… They will try to get a reaction out of you, but doing so will only fuel their fire. Ignoring them and not reacting will make them go away much more quickly.