Question.
I want to have a boyfriend, I have a really big crush on this guy, but I cannot bring myself to approach him. I have trouble talking to anybody and it hurts me physically like in my gut, to be around certain people people some times. I feel like they are having negative thought about me.
How do I deal with this? I want to have a normal life and friends but I just get choked up and cannot talk to people. I mean I start to swallow and cannot control it.. I start actually choking if I am uncomfortable..
Answer
Every so often I get a request for advice to deal with serious shyness in my free psychic question email. The issue here is that
you are suffering from extreme anxiety. This happens to people who are extremely sensitive. This also means that if you are able to focus your concentration away from your fears, you can be a a good, natural psychic.
Let me give you a bit of advice. First of all it helps to focus on your breathing when you feel nervous or uncomfortable. That is right, take deep breaths in to the count of four, from your diaphragm ( the base of your chest) and then breath out to the count of four, do this a few times and your body and mind naturally start to relax.
Also, when meeting people, you will learn that making eye contact for three seconds while smiling always make a bit difference in they way they respond to you. Body language is important. Smile and listen to people. You will find that showing acceptance, without judgment, and letting people talk about themselves is often a recipe to popularity. Everybody likes to take about themselves. when you give attention instead of asking for it, it makes all the difference in the world in how you are liked and perceived. People like people who make them feel good about themselves.
Yep, just let people feel good about themselves and you will find it is much easier to make and keep friends..
A few things that might to help you relax are blue lotus extract, ( try this on your own before using it and going out in public, taking too much of it can make you a little too loosey goosey)
Indian Warrior herb ( you can find these things on eBay) They can help you to relax a bit and release tension..
The kind of stress you are experiencing can also lead to extreme elevations in your body of a chemical called Cortisol, which makes you stress worse. You can help your body relax and slowly stop producing thisi chemical by taking some thing called pearl powder. You can find this on eBay as well.
It really does help if you take it close to the times when you usually stress out…
It is also a really good source of calcium and was used by the royal families in China to maintain health and clam the nerves…
The main thing I am going to recommend is to practice deep breathing when you are feeling like you are choking and to visualize yourself being engulfed in a white light of life energy that can protect you from any negativity that you may pick up from others… Remember that their negativity is theirs, you do not need to take it on to yourself….. There will always be jerks in the world and that is not something you can control. But it is something that you can block out with the right form of concentration by focusing on your breathing and surrounding yourself with with light. Then check out some of the anti anxiety herbs that I have recommended, but always be careful with these substances and only try very small amounts initially, before using them and going out in public… They can be quite powerful and you should not drive when taking these substances. they could make you intoxicated if taken in larger amounts than you can physically handle. So look up proper usage and dosage of these herbs before taking them.
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